layers - gay porn

I have a love/hate relationship with it.  If I completely hated it, I would avoid it...but I don't.  It's one of my biggest temptations, and I wish it would go away! :P  Oh...  The internet is one big temptation... one huge global porn source.  I'm constantly in fear that I'll be found out.  I really hope that porn will become less important to me in college.  Wouldn't that be nice?  I could stop being a pathetic loser who jacks off to net sluts.

Let me describe a weird episode that occurred my sophomore year.  A friend of mine...let's call him Chad... used to come over to my house after school.  We would wait until the stage tech-crew meeting started later that night.  Anyway, we started looking up heterosexual porn together (which, in itself, is not too strange).  It was getting kind of awkward so I went to go watch TV (in the same room).  After awhile, I came back over to "check on" Chad.  He had used a search engine, and, unbeknownst to him, I could see in the crazy-ass-long URL that he had searched for the words, "nude pictures of Tom Cruise".  AHH!!!  He said that he had searched for Nicole Kidman but gotten Tom Cruise stuff instead.  What the hell was I supposed to do??  I can't totally recall my reaction.  And yada, yada, yada...we were staring at loads of gay porn...together.  The entire time (and this is the weird thing!), neither of us mentioned anything about liking men.  I just kept throwing my hands over my mouth and chanting in complete disbelief, "We're looking at gay porn!"  He would just kind of laugh... We were pretty quiet the entire time.  I was very afraid that he was going to make some kind of move.  But we lost track of time, and the doorbell rang, interrupting us.  It ended without major incident...unless you consider looking up gay porn with a friend a major incident... which I do... so it didn't... end without major incident that is...

In case you wanted to know, we didn't say anything about "the incident' to each other ever.  It didn't happen again.  I recently heard that Chad is getting married...to a hot blonde girl.

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